I took a long hiatus from watching the news. I mean, I take a peak at the local stuff – the weather, the traffic – but I have been trying to stay away from all the horror in the world. I can't stomach listening to stories about babies being beaten by their parents or children being sexually assaulted and it seems like that is all you hear about – that or celebrity divorces. So, I tried out the theory “ignorance is bliss” and I kept my TV on Disney channel and Nick Jr. for the past two months. Okay, so maybe I sneaked in some Bravo from time to time – but what episode of the Real Housewives won't make you feel better about yourself? Somehow, however, I got sucked back in and now I find myself internally enraged by the world that surrounds me.
Take Tattoo Barbie. The newest “doll” to hit the markets and currently the scapegoat for thousands of unaccountable parents, carrying the blame for their daughters growing up too fast. Really? I just can't get over this one. Let's break this down. Barbie is what, like 35? She has had a breast reduction, been in a 50-year uncommitted relationship with some dude named Ken and she drives a Corvette with no real job to speak of. I'm pretty sure the tattoo that she gets is not the decision that will cause the demise of girls' self-esteem across the globe. If you let your daughter play with a plastic middle-aged woman on a daily basis, you should consider yourself lucky that Barbie gets a tattoo – it might infuse some culture into them.
I'm pretty sure that these parents so upset by Mattel's latest release are probably the same ones who aren't even phased by real problems that might cause little girls to be disturbed, like having to choose between bikini, hipsters, boy shorts, or low-riding underwear for our newly potty-trained toddlers. Yes, that's right. You can not walk into Target, JC Penney, Gap – wherever – and just buy 2T plain white panties for your two-year old girl. Nope. It is like shopping at a mini Victoria's Secret – every undergarment marketed for lingerie models-in-training. Second-graders wear bras now and I wouldn't be surprised if they have matching thongs. This is ridiculous; this is sexualizing our youth.
Infant girls are wearing bikini's and tutu's and necklaces. Why don't you just hand them a Cosmo, too? 8-year old girls are touting Coach purses and 12-year old tweens are jamming out to Lady Gaga on their iPhones. Does this not carry any weight to why our girls have image issues or problems connecting with their parents? Do you think I am conservative? Do you think that I am too close-minded? Guess what? I have more than one tattoo.
Our society is so backwards. Breastfeeding is offensive, so let's all go eat at Hooters! Celebrate Gay Pride at a children's theme park, but don't you dare say a prayer before school. Limit your son's sugar intake, but inject your children with aluminum through vaccines. Occupy Wallstreet, but don't settle for a job at McDonald's. I just don't get it. Our world is one giant oxymoron.
NEWSFLASH PEOPLE – you are accountable for yourself. You are responsible for your children. Stop shifting the blame and start doing your part.
You may now resume your regular programming.
